300

Please note: this is not about the movie “300”, which I have not seen.

Earlier (“Rebels”, 10/26/09) I have commented on our propensity—human?, American?, hypo-manic?—to try and do so much. Clearly I have not made any changes in my own behavior. Though initially posted with a single sentence on Monday night, I am now catching up with the rest of this blog on Wednesday, all because I’ve been unrealistic about how many things I can get done in 24 hours.

This is exemplified by my email inbox. It refuses to drop below 300 messages and stay there for any length of time.

More accurately, I refuse to let it drop below that number. I could delete every single one of those 300 emails and possibly be better off for it: as far as I know, the world would keep spinning on its axis. Things that are really important would get re-sent to me. I could more realistically tackle current projects without having this number hanging over me.

Most of these messages, however, represent connections that I would like to make or to re-establish with real people. It seems a bit rash to just toss them out without at least making an attempt. And many of the connections are ones that lapsed during my residency. In a way this is my attempt to reclaim, or redefine, that time.

One of my favorite bumper stickers says, “It’s never too late to have a happy childhood.” I like to think that it’s never too late to make and re-make human connections. To whittle away at a number, and in so doing create something intangible, but infinitely valuable.

Even if that means, as by definition it must if so much of my time is spent doing, doing less.